they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
