Ambien. No doubt about it.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
