i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
