So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
