I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
