I just saw a hot homeless man
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
