rhymes with "ouble enetration"
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize