I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
