He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
