i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
