Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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