do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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