Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
