At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
