Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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