hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
