Christians are straight up FREAKS
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
