I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Randomize
