Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Randomize
