Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
