You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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