Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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