wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
