How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
So apparently I’m into choking now
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
