I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Congratulations! We have a period
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
