Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
