For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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