If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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