Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
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