Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
