WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
