Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
