therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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