i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Randomize
