will power is for people who don't want to get laid
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
