Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
time to smoke my breakfast
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
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