is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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