There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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