This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
