Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Enjoy the penises
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
