I am puke
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize
