Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
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