The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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