Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
The adults are the big ones right?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
