this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
