I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
