Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
