Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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