But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
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