I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
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