her vagine was all disorganized.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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